And chewed off his face.
We found the brave soldier, still clutching his sword and shield like the brave poppet he is, at the bottom of a tree this morning.
Please spare a thought for Sir Corky during his recovery period. We hope to see him return to his post on the mantelpiece as soon as he has undergone his face transplant surgery.

Oh no, does this mean you will have to sacrifice a bottle of wine?
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